toby of the day, 6.28.2008

today, toby went to coyote point with his friends, leaving jon and I alone, adrift, without any idea of how to busy ourselves for a few toddler free hours. Actually, that’s not really true at all. Jon and I both came up with myriad tasks, chores if you will, to accomplish during toby’s field trip. we accomplished none of them. While I was at yoga, the husband of our daycaretaker arrived to get toby. Jon asked what time they would return our boy, and was told 3. this seemed later than we had expected, given that most of the other children with normal sleeping schedules take long naps starting around 1pm, but there was some discussion of saturday traffic and other issues so jon let it go. Daycaretaker’s husband then asked what jon and I planned to do in our free time and jon studiously replied with our list of chores. Apparently, daycaretaker’s husband was not impressed by the laundry list of, well, laundry, at which point it occurred to jon that if we had until 3, there was no reason we couldn’t squeeze in a fancy multi-course lunch before mopping the floors. I got home, we gussied up, and went to lunch, discussing how strange but fortuitous it was that they would be gone so long and wondering if traffic between san francisco and san mateo could really add a couple hours onto a saturday excursion. We ate. It was delicious. As we waited for dessert menus, I checked our phone. And of course there was a message from the daycaretaker proper telling us that she was in front of our house ringing our doorbell, wondering why we refused to come down and collect our child. So I signalled to jon that we urgently needed to leave by cartoonishly swinging my thumb towards the door. We hopped in a cab, sped back across town, and jogged up to our doorstep to find them waiting patiently. We apologized profusely, hoping that we hadn’t turned them off of taking toby on future field trips, since now we’ve figured out that if I’d skipped yoga, we could probably have fit in dessert.

toby of the day, 6.21.2008

today we went to a birthday party for a boy in toby’s daycare who just turned 3. It was at a park and involved a tour of a firetruck. Toby was somewhat nonplussed by the firetruck, although he did enjoy banging on the enormous shiny hubcaps with a rock. I wonder if this is just a prelude to a story like the one my parents always tell about paying large sums of money to take me to disney world only to have me spend the majority of the time playing with rocks in the planters. He was also not impressed by getting to see the firemen slide down the pole. I, on the otherhand, found it pretty cool, except for a brief moment when one of them was showboating and stopped half way down only to almost have his head captured by the floor as it closed back up. Nothing ruins a birthday party like a decapitated fireman, so I was pleased when he reached the floor unscathed.

Our other excitement for the day was a trip to crate and barrel in search of curtains with ed and michelle. While we were unlucky at the curtain finding part, we did discover the oasis that a furniture store can be with a toddler, full of variously textured rugs, sofas, and coffee tables; I dare say it’s like a dream come true. Toby played peek-a-boo with other shoppers, drooled on some microsuede, and slid across the wood floors on his belly. I think the only trouble came when we got too close to a rack of hanging rugs. Apparently such a rack is almost as frightening as our hideously colored mobile, or that’s at least what I surmised as toby tried to crawl up my leg when we neared it. Fortunately, it stood between him and the dining section so we did not have to spend his college fund on shattered glassware but instead can continue to save it for the all important purchasing of wine. With any luck, ed and michelle will need to buy some finials for their curtain rods or something, so we’ll have an excuse to return

toby of the day, 6.18.2008

For most of the past 11 months toby has been quite brave. Well maybe that’s a slight exaggeration, but he’s definitely not been especially fearful and responds to most things one of two ways: either with complete indifference, or with an uncontrollable urge grab and eat them. At least until today. Before he was born, we received a mobile as a hand me down. It’s got crazy colored animals and plays Bach, Beethoven, and Mozart through a tinny speaker. Pretty much it’s what happens when science meets capitolism, I imagine the box for it must have oozed with exclamations about all the ways this would make your baby smarter. In any case, Jon and I thought it was ugly and since we didn’t have a crib to hang it from at the time anyway, we dropped it in the closet. Well, today we unearthed it when we went to reclaim some closet space, so I pulled it out to show to toby. He’s recently been adding sidestepping and walking backwards to his repertoire and at first I thought he was incredibly enthusiastic about the mobile as he stepped excitedly in all directions while it played its jangly version of fur elise and spun the tacky colored animals around and around. But it then became clear that he really just wanted to touch the giant plastic screw that was holding it in position but every time he got close one of the crazy animals would drift near his head and try to eat him or steal his soul or whatever it is that scares the pants off an 11 month old and he would frantically move his chubby little legs in every direction trying to get clear of the swinging monstrosity. I guess it turns out that toby is as frightened of ugly toys that clash with any reasonably attractive room décor as we are. We’re so proud of him.

toby of the day, 6.15.2008

today we had a barbeque in the park in celebration of the return from switzerland of our friend maggie and her owners ed and michelle. If you live outside of the 46.7 square miles of San Francisco, the term barbeque might fool you into thinking of a summertime ritual involving shorts, sunscreen and wide-brimmed hats. You would be absolutely wrong. Because it’s summer, we layered toby and ourselves into long sleeve shirts, sweaters, jackets and wool hats and as we stepped into the park, we were already cold. but it was still a good time. I drank two beers, toby ate some flowers, jon made and then ate some delicious coffee marinated skirt steak, maggie ate some kalbi from the people at the neighboring picnic area, and ed and michelle enjoyed a range of non-fondue related food items. I suppose nothing says welcome back to san francisco like a summer afternoon spent shivering in the park, so in that regard I think it was a success.

toby of the day, 6.14.2008

today toby is working hard preparing for his current dream job as a roadie. Unfortunately, until he can figure out how to carry a full sized guitar, he’ll be stuck carrying gear for jake shimabukuro. But you have to start somewhere. And besides, since one of our babyproofing solutions was to use our bass amp to block access to the fireplace, it’s best if he doesn’t learn to move it too soon anyway.

toby of the day, 6.13.2008

today is toby’s second Friday the 13th. The first came when toby was only 58 hours old. Mostly, our luck was good for that first one, at least as good as it can be when you’ve just brought home a new human unaccustomed to life on the outside, and his mother, who is unaccustomed to being so swollen she can’t sit down, and his father who may be accustomed to insomnia, but this insomnia turns out to be a wildly different monster. Yes, I think any grievances we had were not based on superstitious dates. This time around was again pretty uneventful. Until the Russian woman and her banana. They say you should teach your children not to take candy from strangers, but they don’t tell you what to do when a burly Russian women pulls a banana out of her purse and you think she might just be showing it to your son before she eats it herself but then before you know what’s happening, and before your husband, who has his hands full of a toy piano that he’s borrowing from the daycare, can get his hands free to intercept it, she’s feeding it to the infant you have strapped to your chest. While we know the whole tainted Halloween candy and razor blade filled apples is an urban legend, and I’m sure she was just trying to be friendly, we’re going to keep a close eye on him for the next few hours, just in case. It is Friday the 13th after all.

toby of the day, 6.9.2008

tonight, instead of picking carpet strands off the scratching post and eating them, toby brought the strands to jon, one at a time, circling back to get more after handing each one off. I’m confident that fetching me a beer is going to be his next accomplishment, though I suspect that pouring it into a glass for me will take him a while longer.

toby of the day, 6.8.2008

today we had ed, michelle, kevin, jess, and isaac over to eat bacon. Then we headed to the park for wiffle ball. It turns out that wiffle ball may be more dangerous for your knees than women’s soccer. I’m surprised that it wasn’t discussed in depth in that 15 page nytimes magazine article I read. You would think with 15 pages on knee injuries there would be enough space to talk about wiffle ball, but there was nary a mention. Fortunately we all survived without needing a knee replacement and without crushing toby who liked to rush the field to visit his dad when he pitched. I hope we haven’t instilled any bad habits in him for when we go to a professional wiffle ball game. It would be so embarrassing if toby rushed the field. Almost as embarrassing as it would be to attend a professional wiffle ball game. I have to admit that I’m really just continuing to type because wiffle ball has such a nice cadence in my head. Wiffle ball, wiffle ball, wiffle ball. ok, I think that's maybe enough.

toby of the day, 5.25.2008

In 2006 we attended our first carnivale parade here in the city. Because it was our first, and because jon was worried that we might miss it, we were two of the first people on the street and we sat quietly on a curb for an hour and a half or so, awaiting the floats full of scantily clad dancers in feathered headdresses. Apparently, the parade doesn't move very fast, so while it might start somewhere at 9, that somewhere was not at the curb where we were sitting. In 2007, we timed our attendance better so that we arrived when the parade was bustling. Of course that meant trying to weave my bulky pregnant belly through the crowds to a place where we could see the action. this year, we were confident our timing would be perfect, until we stopped off at delfina for wine, house cured salume, and pizza (with spring onions and guanciale). during our leisurely lunch, we sat next to another couple with a wee one. Theirs was a daughter a couple months older than toby. They were kinda different from us. For example, as we ate the breadsticks at our table, it occurred to us that toby might enjoy them, so we focused our resolve on not eating them all before he woke up. At their table, when the wee one got a hold of a breadstick the air suddenly filled with panicked screaming as the mom raced over, stuck all her fingers into her daughters mouth, and pulled out a drool soaked (and rather mushy I might add) chunk of breadstick. The panicked screaming was followed by grumpy and uncomfortable crying from the daughter and wimpering apologies from her dad for allowing her to get a hold of the offending breadstick. When we went to leave, the mom asked if toby was crawling yet and I said that, crazy enough, he was actually walking already. She said you mean he’s “cruising”, our daughter is doing that too. Not knowing what cruising was I of course asked, “you mean for chicks?” she gave an awkward laugh and then she turned back to me and recited a line that I got the impression she uses often “well, by kindergarten, they’ll all be walking and potty trained, right?” she laughed awkwardly again. I said I sure hoped so and we handed toby a breadstick and headed off to meet isaac and show toby some scantily clad dancers in feathered headdresses. as we walked Jon and I laughed at how weird the interaction had been and how awesome we are in comparison. of course, moments later we had to stop patting ourselves on the back as we reached the parade just as the last car rounded the corner and headed back to the staging area. we may not be quite as awesome as we thought, but we did learn some things: 9 is too early, 2 is too late, and guanciale is delicious.